“It was obvious that something wasn’t right from the start,” said Price. The night Catherine was born, Price says she didn’t want to look or touch her. Her maternal malfeasance continues to this day. Playgroup pickup was something to dread, she recalls no landmarks such as a first tooth and when Catherine is sick, Grandma is called in. She admits to ignoring her daughter’s attempts to get her attention and not wanting to be physically close to her. “I did hug Catherine, but it was always half-hearted,” Price said. “I always told her I loved her but I never really felt it or meant it.”
That is just awful. Particulary when there is another child in the house now, Poppy, 2, a daughter who she calls “the love of my life” by her current partner.

I can understand how at times we might not like our children, say, when they break stuff or hit their sister. But that doesn’t mean we don’t love them. Also, many new moms, myself included, feel overwhelmed with the responsibility of a new baby. Coupled with the baby blues or postpartum depression, it’s often very hard to bond.

I have a friend who admitted to me she wasn’t immediately bowled over by her son when she first had him. Many moms go through that. But as time went on, she grew to love her son more than life itself. That’s how you should feel when you have a child, right? Isn’t loving our children — whether it’s at first sight or through time — part of what makes us human?

Psychologists say that a mother’s failure to love her child can result from depression, feelings of inadequacy or when the child reminds her of a bad relationship (i.e., the co-parent). Price fits neatly here, although she says not so.

On the plus side, if there is one, Price recognizes her shortcomings and is trying hard to improve her relationship with her older daughter. “Sometimes, if I’ve been playing with Poppy, she’ll come and sit next to me, put her head on my shoulder and her arm round me, waiting for me to cuddle her,” she said. “I look at her little face and know I’ve hurt her. I do care deeply for Catherine, but I have just never felt the same bond with her.”

Instead of a good night kiss and “I love you, honey,” Catherine hears a nightly whisper in her ear. “I’m sorry for the way I’ve been with you.” Isn’t your heart breaking?

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There are days when life for Adwai Malual looks like an endless wheel. Already she has lived through much: growing up in Sudan as war tore apart her homeland, discovering in the midst of it that she was pregnant, coming to this strange land of America.Then, weeks later, she gave birth to quintuplets.

Now, in a small, crowded apartment in Laurel nearly two months after the babies’ delivery, Malual’s life is dominated by another kind of chaos. It begins every day at 3 a.m., as she wakes up to take over feeding duties from her mother, visiting from Sudan. One by one, she tends to her five babies in 40-minute shifts. By the time she has changed the last one’s diaper, the first is crying for food again. And so it goes for 12 hours straight, until she hands them off to her mother so she can sleep for a little while before waking do it all again.

Life is now confined to this second-floor apartment and to the most basic of human needs: eating, peeing, pooping, burping and sleeping.

“I am grateful for the blessings in my life,” the 28-year-old said recently during a rare break from her babies. “And I am tired.”

All day long, her mind alternates between those two states. She thanks God for the people — many of them complete strangers — who donated diapers, time and money to help her through her grueling first few weeks out of the hospital. Then she prays for some way to survive the weeks ahead.

When Malual, who had been working as a branch inspector of a bank in southern Sudan, first learned that she was pregnant with multiple children — three or four, her doctors in Sudan guessed — she thought it would be easy. “It was my first time as mother,” she laughed.

She traveled to Minnesota when she was 16 weeks pregnant to seek the blessing of her mother-in-law, a family figure who plays a large role in a Sudanese woman’s pregnancy. When they met, her mother-in-law placed a hand upon Malual’s head and then on her belly, anointing both with water. Later, after she left to visit her sister in Prince George’s County, she was rushed to the emergency room with complications. Over the next 11 weeks, a team including more than 30 doctors and nurses was put together to handle her case.

And last month, as her successful delivery of four girls and one boy was announced, television crews and newspaper reporters rushed to Anne Arundel Medical Center to cover the first quintuplets in the hospital’s 106-year history and the first in Maryland in more than three years. Calls poured in to the hospital from people asking how they could help the children, Deng, the boy, and his sisters, Nyantweny, Nyandeng, Abyei and Athei.

In the days that followed, however, many of the offers faded away. The hospital has said it will work with the uninsured family to pay for the costs, but no avalanche of outside support has materialized, nor have companies like diaper manufacturers stepped in to help as sometimes happens in such births.

“I think part of it is the economy,” said the Rev. Barbara Sands, a hospital chaplain who has been trying to coordinate help for the family. “It’s just the times we’re in right now.”
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I’ve never bought into the whole concept that candy makes kids hyperactive so I’ve never denied my children sweets when it came to holiday festivities. But, now there’s reason for the moms who do attribute their tykes’ energetic behavior to treats to relax. This Christmas, let your lil one have a candy cane. Guess what myth topped the list of holiday myths? To find out, read more.

On the subject of sugar making kids hyperactive, report said:

The researchers cite 12 controlled studies that couldn’t detect any differences in behavior between children who had sugar and those who did not. Even when kids had a diagnosis of hyperactivity problems or were said to be more sensitive to sugar, they did not behave differently whether they ate sugar-laden or sugar-free diets. In fact, the biggest effect of sugar may be on parents. Parents rate their children as being more hyperactive if they are told the child has consumed sugar — even when the child hasn’t really had any sweets.

 

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My daughter’s backpack is always filled to the brim with paintings, pictures, and doodles that I can’t bring myself to toss. Rather than tuck them away to collect dust, I’m putting them to good use this holiday season — let’s face it, we can only keep so many! We’re using her lil masterpieces — including completed coloring book pages — to wrap small gifts. Tucking the artwork around books, videos, and boxes, we’ll showcase her artistic talents for all to enjoy! We also added a bit of sparkle by wrapping bows around the goodies with a steady hand and a glitter glue pen. While this homade paper costs pennies, the pictures are priceless!

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The kindergartner on your list may be a bit precocious at times, but he is still a baby in your eyes. Help him continue to explore the world around him with some gifts that are sure to get him asking questions.

Among our favorites for the five-year-old this year are:

• A Make My Own Monster Kit from FAO Schwarz. The kit includes colored pencils, paper, and a detailed questionnaire from which you actually design your monster. The design is then turned into a plush monster, complete with a tag that explains the scary guy’s back story.
• Even though you cringe at the sight of a bug, your tot may love the creepy, crawly things. With the Talking Bug Identifier your little entomologist can ID the critter by answering a few simple yes and no questions.
• The Clementine Printmaking Kit comes with six all-natural paints, brushes, rollers, recycled paper and textured painting tools to help your budding artist create beautiful masterpieces.
• Create an indoor garden filled with beautiful butterflies with the Discovery Butterfly Canopy. The kit comes with a voucher used to order five painted lady caterpillars and the necessary food needed for the larvae to become flying beauties.
• The 170 pieces and 20 marbles included in the Deluxe Marble Run should keep your tot busy for hours. With ramps, bridges, a swivel track, spinners and a motorized conveyer, no two marble runs will be the same.
• Up your cool factor with your kids by introducing them to the Crayola Glow Station. Equipped with a light wand, a light-sensitive canvas, and cool stencils, they can design glow-in-the-dark creations like they’ve never seen before.

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Tinseltown, like many other cities in America, has seen its share of breakups. From Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillippe’s finalized divorce to rumors swirling about the state of Madonna and Guy Richie’s marrige you wish them all the best as children are involved. And, the breakup of families is, well, heartbreaking. But, some couples don’t call it quits until after their offspring are out of the house.

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The paparazzi often catches model mom, Heidi Klum, playing with her children — Leni, 4, Henry, 2, and Johan, 1, but there’s a lot more to motherhood than what is captured in photographs. We had a chance to chat with the haute mama who had a few things to say about the experience.

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It used to be that new mamas debuted their babies after delivery, not their hot postpartum bods.

But, keeping up with Hollywood’s trend of mums bouncing back right after babe, Halle Berry unveiled the fruits of her gym labors at Silver Rose Gala and Auction in LA on Sunday.

While there’s no denying the actress looks amazing after having daughter, Nahla six weeks ago, our friends at Celebrity Baby Scoop have a shot of her looking just as stunning, but less svelte while shopping yesterday.

Do you think the hoopla of Halle’s postpartum perfection sets a ridiculous bar for other child bearing women?

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